I’m a pilot’s wife, it’s true. Proudly so. I love my pilot, and I love my aviation family (that’s you!), whom I have been given the unspeakable privilege of writing for and mentoring. It is, without a doubt, one of the great joys in my life.
But I’m also so much more. I have an identity, a beautiful me, outside of him. You honestly have to in this life or you would go stark, raving mad or become resentful and bitter.
Amongst the many hats that I have teetering preciously on my head is one that just happens to be accompanied by a pair of snakeproof boots, a six-shooter, a lot of hungry critters, and a nice big garden. That’s right y’all, I am a rootin’ tootin,’ down home, hick of a farm girl. Proudly so.
I promise, it’s true. Most days there’s dirt under my nails and a mother clucker (chicken that is) under each arm. And when I’m feelin’ especially frisky, I talk wit’ one of them there reeediculous Texas accents.
Who knew, right!?
One of my favorite farm activities is planting the garden beds. Turning shovelsful of dirt over in the hot sun while the wild things twitter and skitter gives my mind a lot of time to wander. In fact, most of my best material has been written right there between the rows of squash and peppers.
I love sowing seeds. There’s something breathtakingly spectacular about holding a tiny, dormant seed in the palm of your hand.
“Spectacular? It’s just a seed, right?”
No, it’s much, much more. We have become so busy and so jaded with life that we no longer take time to truly marvel at the world around us. We look at a seed and–actually no. We don’t even take time to look at a seed. But we should! Because that seed holds an infinite number of life lessons just waiting to be…well, unearthed!
A seed is a powerful thing. Within each one lies the ability to feed the multitudes. Within each one lies the ability to create life-sustaining oxygen.
Each little seed also holds a candid glimpse thousands of years into the past…and into the future. Each seed contains endless potential just waiting to be released when sown into the ground.
But there’s something that a seed cannot do, and it’s actually upon this ‘cannot’ that I want to elaborate.
When I sow a corn seed into the ground I get…okay, nothing. Because the squirrels come along behind me digging up my hard work and gorging their fat cheeks. But that’s not actually my point. (Yeah, I’m bitter, the little tyrants!) Bad example!
When I sow a tomato seed into the ground, it produces a tomato plant. Cucumber–cucumber plant. Pumpkin–pumpkin plant. And ‘sow’ on and forthwith. You see, a tomato seed cannot produce a bean or a zucchini. Each type of seed produces after its own kind. That’s the nature of seeds.
And not only does it produce after it’s own kind, but it produces after its own kind in multiplicity. A tomato seed will produce a single plant, but each plant bears multiple fruits, and within each of those fruits dwells multiple seeds.
Though these attributes are beautifully true of plants we cherish in our gardens, they are also equally true of the ones we don’t, such as thorns and weeds.
So why does this matter to you? Because your marriage is not unlike a garden. Every word, every action, every choice you make with regard to your spouse is a seed that you are sowing, whether intentionally or not, into the ground of your marriage.
Not only will those seeds take root deep in the heart of your spouse, but they will reproduce after their own kind in multiplicity.
Seeds of love will produce more love. Seeds of bitterness will produce more bitterness. Seeds of kindness will produce more kindness. Seeds of anger will produce more anger. And ‘sow’ on.
However, we have become so busy and jaded with life that we do not take time to ponder the long-term implications of the types of seeds we are planting in our marriages. The problem is that they matter immensely. Today’s seeds will become tomorrow’s harvest.
Sometimes we carelessly or perhaps even purposefully sow handsful of thorns into the heart of our spouse, whether in frustration or out of sheer complacency.
However, we should instead examine each seed and ask ourselves if it is truly what we desire to plant and multiply in the heart of our spouse. We are the master gardeners of our marriages, and we get to choose what we grow.
Let’s choose love!
We are constantly sowing seeds into the ground of our marriages, whether we take the time to ponder it or not. There is great power in a seed. The seeds you sow will produce after their own kind and in infinite multiplicity. That is, after all, the nature of seeds.
The question we must ask ourselves is, are we choosing to sow fruit…or thorns?
I love you, aviation family.
Tailwinds and blue skies.
Angelia (a fellow pilot wife)